I know it’s been a while since I blogged about our adoption process, but it’s because nothing has been happening. At all. Really frustrating. Until today…
On Wednesday I sent an e-mail to the adoption worker in the kids’ state asking if she had gotten the e-mail I sent the week before. I wanted to know if we could do full disclosure (look at and sign off on the kids’ files) and visitation all at the same time rather than waiting on them to mail the files to us. She answered on Wednesday and said that should be fine, but that the reason she hadn’t answered me yet was because the caseworker had not given her the termination packets yet, which is the paperwork we have to review.
I almost hit the roof at that point. The termination of parents’ rights officially was finalized on March 7th. It has been three months and that caseworker still didn’t have the paperwork done! Ahhhhh!
But then the kids’ grandmother called and told me the caseworker had called her and said she was copying the kids’ files as they spoke and would have them on the adoption caseworker’s desk by 4:00pm Wednesday evening.
I e-mailed the adoption worker and asked her if she had them. At 7:30pm that night she responded and said nothing was on her desk. She also said that even if the caseworker was copying the files, that is not all she is waiting on from her. She is waiting on “packets” that can only be completed by the caseworker after termination, which again, was three months ago.
Well at this point I was done. I asked for the caseworker’s supervisor and the adoption worker gave me his name and contact number. I e-mailed at 10:00pm Wednesday night and filed an official complaint against the caseworker explaining my grievances with her. I gave him until Friday to respond and told him if I did not hear from him by then, I would forward my complaint to the state capital.
This morning I woke up to an e-mail from the supervisor, who reported he has only been the supervisor for eight days, but he was committed to doing a full investigation and solving our problem so we can get our kids. He gave me his cell number and direct extension and told me to call him if I could not get a hold of the caseworker. Thank the Lord for putting him in there! Otherwise this mess would never get fixed!
I told the kids’ grandmother and she called the caseworker who immediately called her back. I also called, but did not hear back from her. She told the grandmother that the packets were put on the adoption worker’s desk at 8:00am this morning and that the adoption worker has been written up twice by the Judge for not getting paperwork done in a timely manner to get kids adopted and that she filed a complaint with the adoption worker’s supervisor for lying about what caseworker had done.
Imagine how I felt at this point. Extremely frustrated! So I called the supervisor. He was headed into a meeting but said he would return my call when he got out. In the meantime, I talked with the grandmother again and she told me the kids are crying every day for us. She said my boy fell and bumped his head the other day and started crying “Mommy!” She came to him and said that I couldn’t be there right now, but that she would hold him. He said, “No, I want my Mommy!” So he went and got my picture and hugged it. Well that just tore me apart.
While I was waiting for the supervisor to call me back, I prayed; I cried; I talked to my husband and my Mom and then I got on the tread mill until my phone rang at 4:00pm. It was the supervisor. We had some small talk. I found out he had been in Iraq and that made me feel better. He has been very professional to this point, but knowing he is a military guy makes me feel better because I know he will be top notch at solving problems. I told him our whole story from the beginning. When I finished, he said, “I think your concerns are all valid and I promise to seek out and remove all the obstacles in the way and resolve this problem immediately.” I told him that was great, but that I had a timeline.
I said, “We will be on vacation, but when we come back, I will be at your office that Monday to get the paperwork done. The final visitation will begin that night and then we will take our kids home. Also, I am done talking with the caseworkers. I do not trust them and they have not helped me to this point. I will only be communicating with you from this point forward.” He said he understood and all that was fine. Then he asked for the date again to make sure he had it written down. He said, “I will take care of this by then.” I told him that was good and then asked for three more things I needed when I walked into his office that day. He said he would take care of those as well. I said, “I expect to hear an update from you soon.” He said, “You will” and then wished me a good weekend. I did the same and hung up. Then I told my husband when to ask off work so we can go get our babies. We will be there on that day, ready or not! 🙂